Yup, the process continues, and I must Adjust.
It's nothing that hasn't been done before, many times, by lots of folks,
including Me. (It's just been Awhile, since I've done the whole 'relocate' thing.
This ole farm, was just a Farm,
and all those ole beLoved critters,
are just Critters.
(There will be more, many more! at the Next
Bye bye, Maggiez Farm, byebyebye.
Yeah, I'm a little sad, and just a wee bit Freaked about the whole deal.
None of that matters: what matters? Is that I pull this whole Move-Thing off...
in not just a Timely Manner, but in a Heartly Manner.
I'm Working On It, and I have every reason to believe I will succeed at it. It's Faith, and also
Experience- This Aint My First Goat-Roping, Yanno. Let's Hark, shall we?
Dang, that's cool!
I feel like Harking!
Ak, choke cough.
Here's some of my Today's Observations,
to both puzzle & delight you.
1.) When you've lived in a place for 20 years?
You accumulate a lot of shit. You also accumulate a LOT of memories.
Some are easy to let go of,
some aren't. Some you never will, or will ever want to.
2.)When you Move..
You must condense, sort thru, and throw away lots (most) of it.
3.) Sorting thru shit you haven't even looked at in years, is hard.
(It's actually pretty Pathetic; seeing what you used to think was Important, that you know isn't anymore)
4.) Leaving shit behind is embarrassing. Knowing someone else is going to see your shit?
That is really nervewracking.
(That leads to much wasted effort while you're trying to think 'Forward!' trying to relocate, when you honestly worry about how to excuse what you inadvertently leave behind. Abandoned Kid toys, and bits of horse gear. Moldy throwrugs, and lost sox. Outgrown underwear. REALLY ratty old dishes. Small piles of neglected trash, that you really really MEANT to take to the dump. Maybe even.. some forgotten
Seeds and Stems??)
5.) As long as the Sun is shining, somewhere... it's all going to work out somehow.
(I'm awed and amazed, at just how much I can actually accomplish when I really have to: but?)
6.) It's fucking LONELY.. to do this kind of thing all alone.
I have a Cool Neighbor, who's offered me everything in her World to make this transistion easier
for me. Until I Cash Out, end of this month, she's offered me rides, phone service, home made soup
and an Ear.
Yet she's even less happy than I am with this whole process. She doesn't really want me to leave,
(BlesserHart!) but she sort of understands that I must.
She gives me Reality Checks, and squirms when I tell her that my own Life, doesn't quite work like
hers does. She doesn't and can't understand.. that sometimes Survival
has to come before A Really Good Plan, yet she will Back me to the utmost of her ability;
up to and including babysitting my dogs while I search for a home, or keeping my kitties till I find one.
Sue? You ROCK!
I also have a Son.. who's impressed the Hell out of me with how well he's grown up!
Yet that young man, has a very busy life of his own, trying to take care of his own chosen Family.
He's stressed, but doing everything he'd ever be expected to for Me, for his beLoved Wife, and for his Kids, my Grandkids.
(I hope they know, how hard he's working at it. I cannot ask for more from him, he's doing an amazing
job, of keeping a Low Profile)
I love my kid. I love my friends!
(I just don't love, what I'm going
thru right now)
Still? It'll all work out; it always does.
Happy New Year, Love n Kisses, Peace, Magz